October 03, 2002 - 2:01 pm

i look REALLY cute today. i'm wearing gray slacks and a long sleeve black shirt. i blow dried my hair so instead of being all Hermione-like, it's just straight and purty. purty like eli's lips.

now, you may not give a shit about me looking so damn fine today but it's actually relevant to what i'm going to write about.

see, i figure if this is my last few weeks working in this law firm, i might as well go down looking (as the inner city kids now say) "hottt".

yeah, i think i'm going to get fired.

no really, i can feel them slowly phasing me out. my boss no longer calls me when he needs something, he's been calling another assistant. it's like i'm not even sitting here surfing the net, it's as if i'm invisible or something!

see, i kinda messed up. he was going on this business trip to arizona and he needed a computer and i wasn't able to get it for him.

every day last week he kept saying he would "stop by the office later" (he works from home) but you know what? i think he showed up twice, that's what.

this is just how he is though and i know this, so it does in reality end up being my fault.

anyhow, friday he asks me to get him a laptop for his business trip in arizona. well, i reserve it for him like i'm supposed to. but then he tells me he's definitely coming into the office to pick it up and i believed him.

that's where i messed up. i shouldn't have believed him when he said he was coming into the office.

in fact, what i should have said to my boss is: "look you lying sonofabitch, i'm not fooled. i know you're boyfriend just got back from a business trip. i know you're going to be taxin' it all day today. i know you're not going to come into the office the way you said you would."

unfortunately what i did say was: "okay, i'll see you in a bit".

i told myself i'd get all his stuff together, including the laptop when he came in. well, 4:00 rolls around and still no sign of him.

he finally calls and says he's not going to come in until later that evening when everyone is gone.

so i go to get the laptop and guess what? (the laptop-loaner-outer lady has gone home for the day. only SHE knows where the laptop is). THE LAPTOP-LOANER-OUTER-LADY HAS GONE HOME FOR THE DAY. ONLY SHE KNOWS WHERE THE LAPTOP IS!!!

so, alexis has no laptop.

now, i'm not an idiot. i know that knowing the way my boss is (ie: lying, flaky, unreliable mother scratcher) i should have gotten the laptop earlier, but i didn't. i fucked up.

alexis was so pissed. -wait! that last word not only deserves to be re-written, but capitalized and italicized. alexis was so PISSED.

and i'm worthless. so i think i'm going to get fired.

so, why am i not worried?

because i'm not going to get fired yet. i know this because i know that this coming month, i am indispensible to this law firm. this october is going to be the busiest month i've had since i started working here.

sure they'll fire me come november, and then jobless me will have to solicit funds from her loyal readers to keep me alive. but i'm not worried, i know you all will do a great job of supporting my ass. I TRUST YOU.

so i applied for another job. it's right in the presidio in the city.

(translation: it's right near the golden gate bridge in san francisco).

it would be awesome if i could get this job, really awesome, you guys. i would love it if you all could pray/hope/wish me luck/light candles/do voodoo spells on the other people applying, in order to support me. i want this job soooooo bad.

what's lame though is that i found it on craigslist and it only had an email address as a mode of contact for the employer. i can't call him to hassle him which sucks. but i guess i should email him again. i sent my cover letter and resume on tuesday. natalie and eli think i should send another email today if i haven't heard back from the dude (which i haven't). i'm starting to think i should wait until tomorrow. what do you guys think?

**************************************

roger sucks!

i mean, he probably "sucks" every night, but right now, he sucks in a different way. i don't just mean that he sucks in a what-i-do-to-boys-i-like kind of way.

see, we're supposed to go see Baz Luhrman's La Boheme in the city this weekend and he's flaking on me! *i* still really want to go! he doesn't care about me! it's always about him!

roger this, roger that. everything is always about roger. "me, me, me, me" says roger. he put my entire trip to new york on his credit card two months ago and everyday he calls me up saying: "hey do you have MY money?" or "hey, can you pay ME back now?". sheesh, some people are so self-absorbed.

whatever, i'm getting FIRED!

(you know a month from now, when i actually do get fired, i'm going to re-read this entry and cry).

Friday Bingo - Pigeons in the Park