December 19, 2002 - 11:55 am

my favorite part of my new job is definitely working with the kids.

anyone that i talk to usually ends up puking after i go on and on about how great these kids are and how i'm so happy to have the chance to possibly make an impact on their lives.

but god damnit, i had forgotten how much i missed it in the corporate world. and they're funny little kids.

this week i worked with 7th and 8th graders. on tuesday i did a presentation and it hit me how much older than them i am.

10 years.

see it all came about when i was telling them about this awesome new high school that is going to be built in their city.

kid 1: where is it going to be?

me: well, because everything is still in the works we don't have a facility nailed down yet. More than anything we're concerned with hiring good teachers, having a great program and getting motivated students. we don't think you need to be housed in a beautiful building to have a great school. we think the people make it great.

kid 1: oh. so. where is it going to be?

me: okay well we're looking at one of the parking lots downtown. we plan to set up portables there and then fence it in.

(looks of disgust appear on the kids faces)

me: okay, you guys, i have to say. I'm sure it sounds more ghetto than it's actually going to be...

(classroom erupts in laughter)


because I said the work "ghetto" that's why.

to junior high kids a 23 year old and a 63 year old are practically the same thing. and, well, wouldn't you laugh if you're grandma used the word "ghetto" to describe something?

i was dumbfounded and in my head i thought, 'sheesh, i'm only 10 years older than them. HOLY FUCK, I'M TEN YEARS OLDER THAN THEM!'

kid 2: how long have you been doing this?

me: you mean like going around to classrooms and talking to kids?

kid 2: yeah.

me: you just had to ask me that didn't you?

kid 2: (smiles)

me: well this is actually my first time. are any of you guys nervous right now? is it getting hot in here?

class laughs.

yesterday the seventh graders were even funnier.

first of all, i was going to hand out papers and when i would, some would run up to the front of the class and ask me if they could help. so sweet.

one kid asked me if was going to be the principal of the new school.

me: I'm not that old you guys!!!

shyeah, like they're going to believe me. do you believe your grandma when she says she's not that old? didn't think so.

my grandma is fucking prehistoric. i mean i think she's like 60-something.


in other news, my opinion of texans has increased somewhat.

and you know what it was, it wasn't the fact that the texans who read got all upset and pissy and told me to never spread my texan hating ways again and that i'm a stereotypical witch.

it was that they had a sense of humor about my entry. they were able to laugh about it and admit that those folks who i talked about exist but they enjoy making fun of them too.

redeeming value for some texans: sense of humor.


last night i get home and when i walk in the door the first thing i think is.

'i should have just peed at work. who cares about my fear of public restrooms. i really need to be more kind to my bladder.'

okay so that doesn't really concern anyone, BUT the second thing i thought was 'why does my house fucking stink?'

it didn't stink. it smelled like delicous royal pine.

you know why?

because my boyfriend went out and bought me a christmas tree. that's why.

and in the corner of my living room was the bushiest christmas tree i had ever seen.

and the most beautiful of course.

so last night, eli and i decorated my new christmas tree. he was pretty good at it, for a jew. heh heh.

then i called my mom and told her that eli and i were spending christmas with my best friend natalie's family in Redding.

she thought that was nice.

then i told her that eli and i were going to sleep together. and that we were going to make out all over the floor and do all sorts of indecent things to make natalie's family think that i'm a total ho.

she didn't like that part and started talking all fast in spanish the way she does when she doesn't want to hear what i'm saying.

i told her i was joking.

and she said "oh. ha ha."

i love my mom.

after that i made some Ibarra hot chocolate (mexican hot chocolate) and we watched the Hudsucker Proxy, which has the potential to become my new favorite movie.

i love coen comedies.

i apologize for not having anything more interesting to write about.

i'm loving life right now, so there is no reason for me to go out and make an ass of myself like i used to for amusement. i promise you'll be the first to know about it though.

Friday Bingo - Pigeons in the Park

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