April 05, 2004 - 4:28 pm

absolute shit. that's what i feel like today.

it was one of those days where i start my car and then bang my head on the steering wheel repetitively asking "why? why? why?"

i don't know why "why?" it just seems appropriate. maybe i should be asking "what?"

what causes this fucking feeling where i pretty much hate everyone (yes, including me)?

i'm so sick of people but namely homophobic people.

i wish men could get some semblance of an idea of how absolutely stupid they look when they're homophobic.

just a semblance, not even a whole idea, that would be catastrophic. men bring new meaning to the phrase "baby steps" i've come to learn.

i'm sick of this goddamn fucking war. really, lets just call it quits and bring our men and women home. they don't deserve to be giving up their lives for this shit. let the siblings and families of halliburton and bechtel employees go finish it off. let all the sons and daughters of the senators who voted us into this shit go finish it off.

let piss drunk barbara and jenna lead them all into combat. i'm so sick of all this shit. our troops are out there in such shitty conditions and more are dying every day in the most gruesome ways we can imagine, while we figure out how to get ourselves out of this mess.

those that aren't dying are surely racking up enough images and experiences to land them with post traumatic stress disorder for life.

it's so fucking serious. and here we are! doing nothing! here i am, doing nothing! and i internalize this shit so bad it ruins me and eats at me and i have no way to fix it and i wish i could but my hands are fucking tied and my mouth is fucking gagged.

today hurts.

Friday Bingo - Pigeons in the Park

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